I Woke Up—Smiling
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to L. Y.
I was told that I was a sad man.
Sadness is a fatal disease in this place
where happiness is a key to success.
If you are sad, you are doomed to fail—
you can’t please your boss,
your long face won’t attract customers,
a few sighs are enough
to let your friends down.
Yesterday afternoon I met Pham,
a Vietnamese man who was once a general.
He came to this country
after nine years’ imprisonment.
Now he works hard as a custodian
and always avoids
meeting his former soldiers here,
because every one of them
is doing better than he is.
“Sadness,” he told me,
“is a luxury for me.
I have no time for it.
If I feel sad
I won’t be able to support my family.”
His words filled me with shame,
although I learned long ago
a busy bee feels no sorrow.
He made me realize I’m still a fortunate one
and ought to be happy and grateful
for having food in my stomach
and books to read.
I returned home humming a cheerful tune.
My wife smiled wondering
why I had suddenly become lighthearted.
My son followed me, laughing and frolicking,
while I was capering on the floor.
Last night
I went to a party in my dream.
Voices and laughter were drifting in a large hall
that was full of paintings and calligraphy.
Strolling with ease
I ran into the handwriting of yours
hung in the air
piece by piece waving like wings.
Dumbfounded, I turned
and saw you sitting on a chair,
motionless, the same lean detached face,
only your blue clothes had grown darker.
Something snapped in my chest
and my tears flowed.
What’s the use of promising?
I have promised, a hundred times,
but never returned. Wherever we go
our cause is the same:
to make a living and raise children.
If a poem arises, it’s merely
an accidental blessing.
For several hours my heart ached,
but I woke up—smiling.
I really liked this poem because it spoke to me personally. We live in a society and a world that is not always easy..depending on who you are. Making a living is hard, raising children is hard, just being alive is hard...but we are expected to look happy all the time. At our jobs, we are supposed to look happy in order to make sales or we get talked to by our boss for not putting on a mask. In school we are supposed to look happy or people might report you to the guidance counselor for being depressed or think you're being dramatic. In public, we are supposed to look happy because someone always has it worse, right? In advertisement, they always look happy and smiling but everything is fake. We are forced to put on a face and keep pushing when things in our lives may be giving us no reason to really smile. The double standard in this poem is very strong. We are expected to take on so much and deal with so much tragedy in our lives, yet its almost unacceptable to show the pain we are really going through. But what is worse, acting happy when your not, or dealing with the consequences of showing your true feelings? Its easier to just look happy...
I really liked this poem as well, and I liked the way you interpreted it. I also agree that we live in a society where we're forced to conform and any sign of sadness, anxiety or depression is considered a taboo. Its interesting though, because Humanities class has sort of shown me that those who have the strongest emotions create the most incredible art. Also, why do you think the author ends the poem with "but i woke up- smiling". Do you think he's trying to show that there is always a silver lining and we can still feel happy even when we're in pain?
ReplyDeleteThis was a great choice. You did an awesome job interpreting and it really helped solidify the meaning and clarify. I think you are absolutely right, in our society we are all about fake faces. It's looked down upon to show emotions and when you do you are told you are being dramatic. We are forced to put on a fake face to fufill societies needs before our own emotional needs. In some sense I think sometimes you do have to put aside how your feeling in some situations so that you can get something done or handle something else. Overall I think society needs to let humans express their emotions without always having to put on that fake face. Great poem choice.
ReplyDeleteThis poem speaks to me simply because of the unfortunate truth behind it. Life throws so many events at us with the ability of making us emotionally unstable. However, it seems that showing these emotions or reaching out for help to deal with these emotions is a sign of weakness. Society has a way of twisting everything. We have to put up a facade but the minute stuff gets real, it is us who are blamed for not acting on our feelings. Nothing makes sense.
ReplyDeleteI really like this poem too. I agree that people ask us to hide our true expressions when that isn't fair to society. I feel that it is important to show emotions and not let society push you to mask your true feelings. Ive learned that sometimes it is easy to put on a happy face even when you're feeling up to it. But it is more important to be true to yourself. I really liked how you interpreted the poem below.
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